If you start looking for a connection, you will soon realise: Not every man who presents himself as a generous partner is one. There are genuine, serious men on platforms such as sugardaddyDeutschlands® and Sugar Daddy Planet - but there are also those who only pretend to be. These so-called „salt daddies“ or fakes waste your time, your energy and sometimes even your trust.
The good thing is that counterfeits can be recognised - if you know what to look out for. Experienced women have developed a keen instinct over the years to recognise which profiles are genuine and which are not. In this guide, we show you the eight most common warning signs - so that you can invest your time in the right contacts and protect yourself from disappointment.
Which will also help you: The right tips for dealing with potential partners - because fakes show their true colours, especially during the negotiation phase. The better prepared you are, the quicker you will recognise who you are really dealing with. The following eight warning signs are not theoretical - they are based on the real experiences of women all over Germany, from Hamburg to Munich, from Cologne to Berlin.
1. „Send me a photo of yourself“ - the demand for intimate images
The most classic warning sign of all: A man who barely knows you and is already asking for revealing, sensual or even nude photos. This is usually done under the pretence of wanting to „get to know you better“ - as if the photos in your carefully constructed profile not meaningful enough.
The truth: No serious man who is really interested in a personal connection would ask something like this first. Fake profiles are almost always behind such requests - sometimes young people who collect pictures, sometimes scammers who want to build up pressure. The correct response is always the same: ignore the message, block the profile and report the user to the platform. Your photos belong to you - and they are not part of a negotiation. No real introduction begins with such a demand, and anyone who doesn't understand this doesn't deserve your attention.
2. „I have to test you first“ - free intimacy before the arrangement
You've been chatting to a potential partner for some time. Maybe you've already had one or two meetings - a coffee in Munich city centre, a walk along the Rhine in Düsseldorf. The conversations are going well, the chemistry is right. But as soon as it comes to the concrete framework conditions, the sentence comes: „Before we agree anything, I have to test you first.“
What he means by this is clear: he wants intimacy without anything in return - as a trial run before he commits himself. That's not negotiation, that's manipulation. A serious man knows that a connection is based on mutual trust, and he's willing to invest his part to find out if the chemistry is right. It may well happen that a connection doesn't continue after the initial arrangement - that's normal. But a man with serious intentions takes that risk instead of asking for free samples beforehand. Wrong agreements is one of the most important skills in this world - and this sentence is one of the clearest warning signals.
3. payment per meeting - the transactional trap
This warning signal is more subtle than the first two, but just as important: he offers to pay you per meeting - not a monthly allowance, not a long-term agreement, but money for each individual meeting. And these meetings are all about one thing for him.
Such men are not looking for a partner - they are looking for a service. The difference between a real connection and a pure transaction lies precisely here: A connection is based on mutual interest, time spent together and personal appreciation. A transaction is based on performance and payment - and that is fundamentally different. If a man only wants to pay per meeting, he is on the wrong platform and is looking for something other than what is offered here. This has nothing to do with a personal connection. Block and move on - your time is too valuable to waste on someone who doesn't understand the basics of this world.
4. the show-off - Rolex, yacht and empty promises
He mentions his yacht even before he has spelt your name correctly. His profile reads like a catalogue of luxury goods - Rolex watches, sports cars, a penthouse in Frankfurt, a holiday home on Lake Garda. In the first five messages, he has mentioned his monthly income at least three times and described his lifestyle in the most dazzling colours without even once asking you about yours.
The reality: Serious men with real assets don't flaunt their wealth. They know that discretion is part of good manners - whether in a private bank in Zurich or on a dating platform. Real men with substance convince through their personality, not by listing their possessions. Those who constantly boast are usually trying to replace a lack of substance with dazzle. They want to lure you in with the promise of wealth - but when it comes down to it, rarely is any of it real.
A common mistake, especially among beginners, is to believe that the richest man is automatically the best partner. This is almost never true. The best partner is the one who takes care of you, who is reliable and who keeps his promises - not the one with the loudest appearance. A quiet businessman from Hanover who provides regular and reliable support is worth more than a self-proclaimed millionaire from Berlin who disappears after three weeks.
Recognising warning signals
Demanding intimate photos, exaggerated boasting, avoiding concrete agreements - learn the most common patterns that indicate a fake profile.
React correctly
Block, report and move on. Never get involved in discussions - your time and energy are too valuable for profiles that are not serious.
Find real partners
Serious men show respect, communicate openly and keep promises. Invest your attention in profiles that show these qualities.
5. rude, disrespectful and unbearable
Some men are unpleasant from the very first message: patronising, disrespectful, sometimes even insulting. They treat women like objects, speak in commands instead of questions and have no interest in the person behind the profile. If a potential partner is rude or derogatory to you at any point, break off contact immediately - regardless of how wealthy they appear. No budget in the world can compensate for a bad personality.
No amount of money in the world is worth the emotional damage that a disrespectful person can cause. Whether it's a first meeting in a café in Leipzig, a message on the platform or a phone call - as soon as the tone isn't right, the whole basis isn't right. The different relationship types in this world have one thing in common: they are based on mutual respect. Without respect, there is no basis - and without a basis, there is no connection that is worthwhile.
The best partners are first and foremost good people: Men who understand politeness, consideration and empathy. A successful entrepreneur from Stuttgart who listens to you attentively and values your opinion will always be more valuable than a loud braggart from Cologne who treats you like a subordinate.
6. the bargain hunter - haggling to the point of impertinence
You can usually recognise this warning signal in the negotiation phase: he offers you significantly less than you expect - not a little less, but half or even less. And he haggles persistently as if he were at a flea market in Essen and not in a personal conversation about a connection between two people. Every counter-demand on your part is met with a roll of the eyes or a „that's too much“ - without any willingness to engage with your perspective.
A serious partner knows that a relationship is not a business and that you are not a product. He understands that fair framework conditions are the basis for a relationship that satisfies both sides. Aggressive bargaining shows that they don't see you as a partner, but as a commodity - and that's a clear sign that you should move on. Respectful negotiations feel different: It's a conversation at eye level, not a trial of strength.
An important note: There are men who don't have the highest budget but can still be great partners. Long-term, valuable connections don't just depend on money. If you like a man who is a little below your expectations, you can find a solution together - such as meeting less often or adjusting your expectations. The difference to the bargain hunter: this man negotiates respectfully and at eye level, not aggressively and belittlingly.
7. „I'm doing you a huge favour“ - the patronising type
Some men make you feel like you should be eternally grateful to them - just for talking to you. They constantly emphasise how generous they are, how much they do for you and how lucky you are. What they overlook: A true connection works both ways.
Women who have learnt to stand out from others, know exactly what they bring to a connection: Company, emotional support, listening, attention, lightness. You are by his side when he needs to relax after a long day at work in Hamburg or Frankfurt. You make him feel valued - not as a financial backer, but as a person. It's not a one-sided favour, it's a partnership on an equal footing.
If a man doesn't understand this mutual aspect and constantly presents himself as a benefactor, that's a warning sign. He doesn't see the relationship as an equal partnership, but as a power imbalance - and that's not a healthy basis for anything. Those who constantly emphasise how much they give usually expect a disproportionate amount in return. Good partners - whether in Mannheim, Augsburg or on the Baltic Sea - recognise and appreciate what both sides bring to the relationship.
8. the egocentric - when everything revolves around him
You're sitting in a fine restaurant in Dresden and he's been talking for an hour - just about himself. His business successes, his travels, his plans, his opinions. You've only been able to say maybe three half sentences in the whole time before he comes back to himself. Over dessert, he explains his vision for the next ten years - and hasn't asked you once about your goals. You now know all about his company, his car and his last business trip to Singapore - but he doesn't even know what you're studying or where you work.
Egocentrics are a particular challenge because they can appear impressive at first glance - self-confident, eloquent, successful. But a connection in which only one side speaks is not a connection. It is a monologue. And if a man has no interest in getting to know you - your desires, your goals, your life - he will also have no interest in keeping a fair agreement. He will always assume that his needs take priority. A connection thrives on exchange - and anyone who only sends without receiving has not understood the basic idea.
Further warning signals at a glance
In addition to the eight main types, there are other patterns that may indicate a fake profile or a dubious partner. Controlling behaviour or excessive jealousy even before an agreement is reached are clear exclusion criteria - no one who thinks they own you before they even really know you is a good partner. Equally suspicious: endless promises without concrete action - he talks a lot about travelling to Lake Constance together, dinner evenings in Heidelberg and generous support, but as soon as things get concrete, he evades or disappears. There are men who write messages for months without ever suggesting a real meeting - this is also a clear sign that something is wrong.
You should also become suspicious if a profile agrees too quickly and too readily to everything you propose. Real negotiation involves compromise - if someone says yes to everything straight away, they may not be planning to keep their word. And the most important advice of all: Trust your gut. If something isn't right, it isn't right. Safety in dating begins with the decision to listen to your intuition - whether you're travelling in Bremen, Nuremberg, Freiburg or any other city in Germany.
How to protect yourself effectively
Fakes are harmless if you recognise them early. But if you don't recognise them, they can waste your time, energy and trust - and in the worst case, cause emotional damage. Protection against counterfeiting is not paranoia - it's common sense. Use the security functions of modern platforms: Identity checks, rating systems, internal messaging systems. Never share personal details such as your address, full name or bank details before you have met a man in person and built up trust.
Always meet in a public place on your first date - a restaurant in Hamburg's Hafencity, a café in Bonn city centre, a wine bar in Stuttgart or a pub on the Alter Markt in Potsdam. Tell someone you trust about your meeting - where you're going, who you're going with and when you want to be back. And take the time to really get to know a man before you commit to an arrangement. The best connections are not made overnight, but through patient, attentive familiarisation. How to maintain the interest of a serious partner, you can find out in our separate guide - because once you've found a good man, it's worth investing in the connection.
Finally, a thought to encourage you: Yes, there are fakes and salt daddies - but there are also many honest, respectful and generous men who are looking for a woman just like you. The time you invest in recognising warning signs is not time wasted - it is an investment in your safety and in the quality of your future connections. Whether you're in Munich, Dortmund, Wiesbaden or a small town in Saxony - the right connection is waiting for you. You just have to learn to weed out the fake ones - and with every fake you recognise, you become more confident and experienced in your search.
Frequently asked questions about fake profiles
A salt daddy is a man who pretends to be generous and wealthy but has no serious intentions and does not honour his promises. Typical recognisable characteristics are exaggerated boasting, evasion of concrete agreements and demands for something in return before the arrangement.
Because a serious partner is willing to invest in a connection without setting preconditions. Asking for a „test“ is usually an attempt to get free intimacy without ever really committing.
Caution is advised. Real, wealthy men are usually discreet about their finances. If someone is constantly bragging, he probably lacks substance - or is trying to lure you in with empty promises.
Cancel the contact immediately, block it and report it to the platform. No amount of money justifies emotional damage. Respect is the absolute basic requirement for any connection.
Yes, that can be a warning signal. Real negotiations involve compromise and open dialogue. If someone agrees to everything without asking questions, they may be planning not to keep their word later.
Trust your gut feeling, use the platform's security functions and never share personal data before you have met someone in person. Always meet in public places for the first time - and inform a trusted person.
