First sugar date: You should never say these sentences

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First sugar date: You should never say these sentences

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Anyone who is active in the world of modern dating knows that it's not enough just to be there. On platforms like sugardaddyDeutschlands® and Sugar Daddy Planet, there are many women with similar profiles - nice photos, a few nice words, the same standard phrases. But the women who find really interesting, respectful and long-term connections do something different. They set themselves apart - not by appearances, but by personality, depth and the way they communicate with potential partners.

In this guide, we'll show you how to stand out from the crowd and find exactly the right partner for you. It's not about pretending - on the contrary. It's about making your real strengths visible and sending the right signals. Sugardating thrives on genuine connections, and experienced women know: The key lies not in the appearance alone, but in what lies behind it.

The hidden attraction - why personality counts more than beauty

Every experienced salesperson knows: people don't just buy a product - they buy a feeling, a solution, an experience. When you choose a dress, you don't choose just any dress. You choose the one that triggers something specific in you - maybe the way it falls, the colour, the fit. There is a hidden allure that guides the decision.

It works the same way when looking for the right partner. A serious man has many options on dating platforms. There are plenty of beautiful women - whether in Munich, Hamburg, Berlin or Düsseldorf. What makes him take a longer look at your profile and write you a message is something other than a pretty photo. It's the overall picture: your interests, your choice of words, the way you present yourself. Real men with substance are looking for substance - not the umpteenth copy of a generic profile.

The obvious reasons for a relationship are obvious: companionship, shared experiences, appreciation. But he could get that from many women. What makes him want to spend time with you lies deeper - in the hidden qualities that make you special as a person. Maybe it's your ability to hold a good conversation. Maybe it's your emotional intelligence. Maybe it's your open-mindedness or your dry sense of humour. These are all things that a photo can't show - but that a well-written profile and a thoughtful first message can convey immediately.

The competition on such platforms is real. In Germany, for every serious male user, there are often several women who want his attention. This doesn't mean that you have to bend over backwards - but it does mean that you should be strategic. Your profile is your business card, and as with any good business card, first impressions count. A well thought-out profile with the right photos is the first step to standing out from the crowd. It's not about being someone else - it's about showing the best version of yourself.

Your interests and hobbies as a magnet

The most common mistake that beginners make: a profile that only consists of outward appearances. „I'm pretty and like to be pampered“ - this kind of description attracts the wrong men and bores the right ones. A serious partner in Frankfurt or Stuttgart wants to know who you are - not just what you look like.

Instead, focus on what defines you as a person: your interests, hobbies, passions and goals. Do you play the piano? Are you interested in contemporary art? Are you a passionate cook who likes to try out new restaurants in Cologne? Do you enjoy reading philosophy or travelling to Lake Constance at the weekend to go sailing? Are you a literature student in Göttingen who spends evenings discussing Kafka? Or a graphic designer in Essen who spends her weekends scouring flea markets for vintage furniture? All of this makes you unique - and that's exactly what should be visible in your profile.

A concrete example: A student in Leipzig who is passionate about baroque architecture mentions this in her profile. An entrepreneur from Dresden, who is an art lover himself, immediately finds this shared passion appealing. The connection does not begin with superficial attraction, but with genuine interest - and it is precisely such connections that last. The different relationship types have one thing in common: the best ones are based on shared interests.

Another advantage of showing your real hobbies: You automatically filter out the right men. Anyone who responds to your profile because your passion for classical music appeals to them is a fundamentally different type than someone who only responds to a photo. The quality of your contacts increases dramatically when you show real personality.

Show real personality

Share your real interests, hobbies and passions in your profile - this attracts partners who really suit you.

Take the initiative

Suggest activities and plans, organise meetings and show that you are more than just a passive companion.

Contributing your own perspectives

Don't be a yes-man - successful men appreciate honest opinions and fresh perspectives that enrich their lives.

Initiative and organisation - become an indispensable companion

One of the most effective ways to set yourself apart from other women is initiative. Many women passively wait for the man to organise everything - the next date, the restaurant, the activity. But successful men in Hanover, Frankfurt or Nuremberg have full diaries and little time for planning. If you're the one who says: „There's a jazz concert at the Philharmonie on Saturday - should I get us tickets?“, you immediately become the exception. This one sentence sets you apart from dozens of women who just write „When are we meeting?“ and then wait for an answer.

This does not mean that you should become a personal assistant. It's about showing genuine interest and actively organising your time together. If you know your partner is interested in wine, research a wine tasting in the Rheingau region. If he loves art, find an exhibition at the Hamburger Kunsthalle or the Museum Ludwig in Cologne. This kind of attention shows that you're listening, thinking and committed to the connection.

A concrete example: A woman in Bonn knew that her partner needed to relax after a stressful quarter of business. She organised a weekend at Lake Tegernsee - a quiet hotel, a good restaurant, walks in the countryside. He was delighted, not because it was expensive, but because it was well thought out and showed that she understood him as a person. Maintaining long-term connections means exactly that: being attentive and investing in the relationship. The result is a connection that goes beyond the ordinary - and a partner who sees you as indispensable.

Bringing in your own perspectives - why yes-men are boring

Successful men spend their entire working day making decisions and being right. Their employees agree with them, as do their business partners. What they need least of all in their free time is another person who nods to everything. And that is precisely the mistake that many women make: they are so eager to please that they completely put their own opinion on the back burner.

A friend told me about an experience with her partner. They were in a hotel - he complained about the service and wondered whether the hotel was worth it. Instead of agreeing, she explained to him a different perspective: that not everything has to be looked at from an economic point of view, that the hotel has its own charm and that sometimes the intangible value is more important than the balance sheet. He was surprised - and impressed. For the first time, someone had shown him a perspective that he never got to hear in his everyday business life in Bremen or Dortmund. This moment fundamentally changed the dynamics of their relationship - suddenly he saw her not just as a beautiful companion, but as a dialogue partner at eye level.

This does not mean that you should constantly contradict yourself. It means being authentic. If you have an opinion, share it - respectfully but honestly. If you disagree, say so. If you have an idea, contribute it. Men of substance appreciate intellectual challenge and fresh perspectives. A woman who has her own thoughts and articulates them is far more interesting than one who just says „yes, that's right“. The right questions and honest answers create a level of connection that goes beyond the superficial.

Another aspect: many women try to be the perfect companion by fitting in completely. They pretend to have the same interests, to like the same music, to favour the same restaurants. This may work for one or two dates - but in the long run it becomes exhausting and untrustworthy. Real compatibility doesn't come from fitting in, but from authentic similarities and respectful differences. If he's a Bayern Munich fan and you're not into football, that's perfectly fine - as long as you bring something of your own to the table instead that enriches the connection.

Your unique selling point - find out what makes you special

Back to the dress analogy: if you buy a dress that excites you, it's because of a certain detail - the cut, the fabric, the way it emphasises your figure. Similarly, there is something about you that sets you apart from others. Maybe it's your sense of humour, maybe it's the way you listen, maybe it's your knowledge of a particular subject, maybe it's your ability to walk into a room with ease. Every woman has that one special point - the trick is to recognise it and use it consciously.

Find out what it is and make it visible. Write it in your profile, show it in your messages, live it at meetings. Your unique selling point is like a magnet - it attracts exactly the right men and repels the wrong ones. An architecture student in Heidelberg who can talk about architectural history will attract a different type of man than a woman whose profile consists only of selfies. A man in Wiesbaden who is interested in culture himself will react immediately when he finds a woman who shares his passion. A female musician in Lübeck who plays in jazz clubs in the evening tells more about herself in one sentence than a hundred standard phrases ever could.

Once you have found your point of difference, consciously include it in your profile and in your conversations. The right tips for dealing with potential partners help you to take this advantage with you into the negotiation phase. If you know what you bring to the table, you can communicate confidently - and self-confidence is one of the most attractive qualities of all.

Proactive instead of passive - why personal initiative makes the difference

Many women on dating platforms behave passively: they create a profile, upload a few photos and wait to be contacted. This works to a certain extent - but it's not the strategy that produces the best connections. The most interesting partners don't choose the woman who smiles the prettiest - they choose the woman who shows them that she's really interested. Passivity signals indifference or disinterest, and that's the opposite of what a good connection needs.

This means: Write the first message. Ask specific questions about his profile. Show that you are interested in him as a person, not just in what he can offer. If you live in Freiburg and his profile mentions that he likes hiking, suggest a tour in the Black Forest. If you're in Mannheim and he's a wine lover, suggest a restaurant on the Bergstrasse. These little details show genuine interest - and that's what sets you apart from the hundreds of other messages he receives every month.

Safe dating also means choosing wisely who you write to. Not every profile deserves your attention. Learn to recognise counterfeits and focus your energy on the profiles that look serious - fully completed, with real photos, with a description that shows that the man knows what he is looking for. Quality over quantity applies not only to connections, but also to the messages you send.

The overall impression - why it depends on the interaction

In the end, it's not a single quality that makes you stand out - it's the combination of everything. Your profile, your photos, your messages, the way you talk, your attentiveness, your initiative, your honest opinion. All of this together creates an image that serious men recognise immediately: Here is a woman who knows what she wants and what she brings to the table. In a world where many profiles seem interchangeable, authenticity is the strongest currency you have.

The best connections are made between people who meet at eye level - and that starts with how you see and present yourself. Avoid false agreements and to move away from stand out from the crowd are two sides of the same coin: if you know what you are worth, you won't allow yourself to be treated beneath value. Self-confidence is not arrogance - it is the knowledge of one's own qualities and the willingness to show them.

Whether you live in a big city like Berlin or Munich or in a smaller town like Kassel, Augsburg or Potsdam - the principles remain the same. Show who you are. Be active. Contribute your perspective. And invest your time in the right contacts. The more authentic you were from the start, the better the arrangement will be in the end. How to maintain the interest of a good partner, is the next step - because once you've taken off, it's all about nurturing and deepening this connection.

Always remember: the right preparation, coupled with authenticity and self-confidence, is the surest way to make a connection that really works. You are not a product in a shop window - you are a personality with your own strengths, goals and qualities. And that's exactly what every potential partner should feel from the very first moment, whether it's the first glance at your profile or the first coffee in a café on the Alster in Hamburg. The woman who knows and shows herself will always find the right partner.

Frequently asked questions about standing out from the crowd

Why is a pretty photo alone not enough?

Because serious men are looking for personality, common interests and real character - not just outward appearances. A profile that only consists of pretty photos is no different from hundreds of others and often attracts the wrong contacts.

How do I find out what makes me different from other women?

Ask yourself: What inspires me? What skills do I have? What do friends say about my strengths? Your unique selling point can be a special talent, an unusual interest or simply the way you communicate.

Should I write the first message?

Absolutely. Being proactive shows genuine interest and immediately sets you apart from the many women who passively wait for messages. Ask specific questions about his profile to show that you have really read it.

How do I organise joint activities without being intrusive?

Pick up on interests he has mentioned in the conversation. Make a noncommittal suggestion rather than a definite one: „I've seen that there's a jazz concert - would you like to go?“ shows attention without pressure.

Is it risky to express your own opinion?

On the contrary - it's an advantage. Successful men are used to being agreed with and appreciate it when someone honestly and respectfully offers a different perspective. Authenticity makes you interesting and memorable.

How do I avoid the fierce competition on platforms?

Focus on quality rather than quantity: A well thought-out profile with genuine interests, proactive messages and initiative in planning joint activities will make you stand out from the crowd. Be authentic instead of generic.

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